Sometimes I Write

It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m sitting here at the dining room table looking out a window that faces the mountains. Actually, most of the windows in this house have a pretty fantastic view of them. The weather today is absolutely beautiful and I am a little sad that I’ll be leaving in a few hours to drive back to Denver. I could use a few more days here.

The weekend was good. Not exactly what I was hoping for, but I did accomplish all of my goals for the weekend. I slept in every morning until 9 am or later. I spent a whole afternoon with Linda. I did my best to live in the moment and not make a million plans and fill up every minute with “stuff”. I left my in-laws a lovely note telling them how much they mean to me and how grateful I was for them giving me a place to get away from my busy life for a few days. Though I did enjoy a Cherry Coke and some Cool Ranch Doritos, I ate other things as well…some of them were even healthy.

I’m going home with some definite ideas of things I need to work on, and one of the most important on the list is making time for mini-retreats. I can’t afford (financially or any other way) to drive to Buena Vista every weekend, alone, so I can get refreshed and refocused. I need those things, but I don’t have to be 2 1/2 hours from my house to do it. I do have a “day of rest” every other week, but my silly self tends to fill it up with activities I feel like I should do and I usually end up inviting a friend to spend my time with me. It’s not that it’s a bad thing to do that, but I wonder if underneath it all I’m avoiding being alone so I don’t have to face some of the things I struggle with.

I love people. I love spending one on one time with them. That is really difficult to do in this season of my life. I have three young children who need me and we can’t afford babysitters. I want to focus on my husband and give him the time, attention, and encouragement he needs and deserves. I rely so heavily on my day of rest to catch up with friends for coffee and personal chats we never get to finish on the phone, that I forsake the “me” time that I really need. I am going to have to be stronger in that area for awhile so I can be refilled not just with relationships with people, but the relationships I have with myself and with God.

Monday:  The last thing we did before coming back to Denver was visit Cascade Falls on Mt. Princeton.  This is a picture I took last summer.  I try to visit there every time I make a trip to Buena Vista.  I climb all over the rocks to find a good place to sit and think.  Speaking of rocks, I found 9 heart stones not including this one which was too big to dig up.  It measured about 9 inches across, but went deep into the ground.  It wouldn’t budge even with me digging around it for awhile. Hmmm…could be another lesson I’m supposed to pay attention to.