Sometimes I Write

Lastnight my friend Tricia and I went to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. We really enjoyed it. It was visually fascinating, and I’ve enjoyed watching Harry, Ron, and Hermione grow up and into themselves. Once again it was plain for me to to see the Christian parallels and lessons that can be pulled out of the story. I can’t wait for Benny to see it so we can discuss it. It was an enjoyable experience with the exception of one thing. The family sitting behind us. A mother brought her young son (Maybe 4 years old) and he was scared during several of the intense and/or scary scenes. Tricia isn’t a mother, but she agreed with me that the movie was totally inappropriate for young children. Even the movie ratings system says so, not that you can trust that all the time. This poor little boy didn’t outright cry, but he kept whining that things on the screen were scary and though I couldn’t see him, I’m sure he was hiding his eyes quite a bit. I can think of atleast 10 things in the movie that would stress my six year old out, if not totally freak him out and give him nightmares for weeks. My child is not a sissy, but he’s very tenderhearted and doesn’t handle seeing people/animals get hurt very well – and I’m glad. Every time there was a tense moment, my frustration with this mother grew. It was obvious to everyone within a 10 seat radius that this little boy should have been taken out of the theater, but ofcourse what can you say to a parent about it? It was HER decision to make.

I had a discussion with a friend this summer who wanted to know if Max had seen Batman Begins yet. I was surprised and told her no – and he wasn’t going to until he was older. She had taken another friend’s little boy – same age as Max, and he loved it. Though Benny and I loved it, we didn’t feel it was age appropriate for Max. The scarecrow alone would have caused nightmares. We discussed how Max is tenderhearted and she suggested that what he can’t handle maybe another 5 year old could. After much thought, I totally disagree. The movie was NOT made for children even though the merchandise was marketed to them. Max got most of the Batman Begins weapons for his birthday and he loves them. He didn’t have to see the movie to enjoy them. He has seen Batman cartoons, so he kind of knows how they are used – to help people. We have rules at our house about weapons because we also have real ones used in martial arts. We have been known to keep him from certain cartoons and t.v. shows because they were too violent or contained questionable material for his young mind.
On another occasion, I was upset when Max came home from a friend’s house in Wichita and told me all about the movie Spiderman. We had decided that it was too intense for him to watch just yet, especially because of the green goblin and the blood, yet my neighbor lets her kids watch whatever they want and assumed I did the same. We had a talk and she agreed that in the future she’d check with me first before letting the boys watch a movie.
I also remember early in our marriage going to see Jurassic Park, another movie made for adults but marketed to kids. There was a mother with two small children who cried through part of the movie because they were scared. This mother kept slapping them and telling them to be quiet so she could watch the movie. Looking back I wish I would have said something to her – especially about the hitting – and Benny was probably surprised that I didn’t. Instead I think I just shook my head in disgust and tried to ignore them all because what else could I do? Some people are just idiots.

I have a huge problem with marketing to kids in general – they don’t have the buying power, or the common sense to check things out and make informed decisions. Movie memorabilia is no exception.

I think whether or not a movie is appropriate is up to the parent, and the movie rating system is just a GUIDELINE. However, there has to be some responsibility exercised here. Movies that are made for adults are NOT appropriate for children, regardless of their age. A six year old should not be sitting in a PG-13 or R movie. It got that rating for a reason. Have we forgotten that PG stand for “Parental guidance suggested”? Where’s the guidance in that? And also, the rating system has changed so much over the years. What was once considered to be rated R is now PG-13. Then there was the addition of the rating NC-17. Come on people. Do I really want to exercise that “freedom of choice” at the expense of desensitizing my children to things that SHOULD scare and horrify them? Should I let my kids watch a movie just because “they can handle it”? I don’t think so. Not everything they Can do is beneficial for them.

We try to check out movies on www.screenit.com before letting our kids watch them. The website isn’t a movie review, it tells you about any cussing, nudity, disrespectful attitudes, violence, blood/gore, intense scenes, etc. We also ask friends who have already seen the movie in question. We try to be well-informed and if we still wonder, we see it before letting Max see it.

We want to take Max to see The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. We’ve been reading the book with him and we borrowed the BBC version from the library and Benny watched it with the kids lastnight while Tricia and I were at the theater. (We saw them a few years ago and knew they were o.k. – if not a bit slow.) Anyway, we have heard from a few people about the intenseness of the battle scene and the stone table scene. We also read a review that said those scenes might be a bit intense for a 7 or 8 year old. Max knows what happens, but will the moviemaking magic frighten him or put him on edge? We’ve already decided to see it first before allowing Max to go, but I’m interested to hear from you what you think about these scenes? I’ve already solicited the opinion of a friend who took his daughter to see it, and I’m waiting to hear from him. I’d like to hear your thoughts on this…